Rules of dating 2016
Rules of dating 2016
Say which music you like, and your favourite place to see your friends.Specific information does more than make you sound interesting – it also gives potential dates something to write to you about.
Often, paying for others is a gesture of love and care—a way to show someone that you don’t mind investing in them, even if you’re just getting to know them.” If, on the other hand, you ardently believe in splitting the check for one reason or another—because it’s easier, cleaner, fairer, or whatever—that’s OK, too.The most important thing is to gauge whether your values are similar, because that can help you figure out whether this is someone you should keep seeing, she says. “Money is important in relationships right from the get-go.It’s really symbolic of emotions and an area that can have tremendous meaning.” Below, Fields explains some of her top tips for navigating the awkward topic of money when you’re dating.“It’s nice to always offer and make the gesture,” says Fields.“Be sensitive to different financial situations and try to pick up on cues based on people’s jobs and living situations.You do this by being original and, above all, specific about your interests.
Instead of saying that you like sunsets, mention the best sunset you’ve ever seen.
Discuss each of your budgets and at least make sure you have a ballpark sense of what the other person makes and what their financial situation is in terms of savings and debt.” It might be unromantic, but it’s realistic, says Fields, especially given that money is one of the top two reasons why couples break up (in-laws are the other—ha).
At the end of the day, it’s wise to pay attention to what someone is showing you about their character, especially when it comes to money.
(Except maybe talking about sex with your parents or explaining why you’re a die-hard Democrat to your 90-year-old grandmother.) People can be famously neurotic about money, whether they have a ton of it or are trying to save more.
And on a first date, which is already a delicate, nerve-wracking situation, trying to figure out who should pay for what, and when, and how much, can be confusing and stressful, to say the any hard-and-fast rules.
My friend Jamie, age 29, always expects her dates—no matter how they met, or who asked out whom—to pick up the tab.