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It's a conversation that could've been ripped from the third season of Grace and Frankie, which revolves around a company that Fonda's character and her best friend, played by Lily Tomlin, establish to create vibrators for older women — their kids are embarrassed.But according to older women on the dating scene, that plotline doesn't even begin to reflect the mountains of drama and humiliation they're routinely forced to navigate while pursuing a relationship.
And on the flipside, when a pair of American morning TV show co-hosts laughed like a pair of nervous schoolgirls and chastised Grace and Frankie star Jane Fonda for repeatedly saying the word "vibrator" on a morning television show, in March, the Today show faced backlash."This TODAY show puts America back 50 years. " wrote one commenter on You Tube, echoing the sentiments of many others."Jane and Lily are awesome, and THANK YOU for being upfront about issues that women care about," wrote another.
Professor Imelda Whelehan, an expert on ageing and popular culture at the Australian National University, thinks the trend has resulted in part from the realisation, on behalf of media gatekeepers, that older viewers want to see their experiences reflected back at them.
"When I go to my local indie cinema here in Canberra, I'm one of the younger ones," said Professor Whelehan, who is 57.
"I wondered if we would have sex surrounded by stuffed toys and family photos," Razer writes in The Helen 100, the book she released earlier this year, about the dating binge she undertook after her partner of 15 years up and left. It's what happened after one of Razer's dates, who had promised the columnist a night of mutually agreed upon "rough sex", sprung on her the news that his babysitting plans had fallen through.
Would Razer, 49, mind joining him and his nine-year-old daughter to see Barbie Live: The Musical? And yes, she did mind."I wasn't getting laid tonight," Razer would later write."My vagina had fused shut like Barbie's." These dating experiences sound made up, the sort of stories you'd expect to see in a Girls for the menopausal set — if such a series existed.
A 2013 report by the Reserve Bank of Australia found Australians aged 55 to 64 owned total assets that far eclipsed anyone younger than them.
In other words, they're cashed up and ready to pay for films and books that reflect their lives.But is the current spotlight on older women here to stay?Or will it sink back into the firmament like so many other trends — Truman Capote films, modern westerns — before it?But according to Helen Razer, the reason these sorts of stories are appearing more frequently on our screens and in our books is profit.Executives have realised older women "are among the society's biggest spenders", she said.But suddenly, the poignant, heartbreaking and funny (and not-so-funny) dating experiences of women in late middle age and up have exploded onto our screens, and into our reading material.