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I stood silently as the whole thing started to unravel. They didn’t really know each other, all they knew were the superficial details that anyone else can be privy to.I make it a policy not to give my friends relationship advice unless they explicitly ask for it (and a lot of the time they won’t because they know I’ll hit them with the truth and they would rather stay in denial-ville). What do you know about him that you couldn’t find out from his online dating profile or Facebook page? Well he would show me pictures of his nieces and nephews and talk about them! Anyone on Facebook could see the pictures and I’m sure he talks about them to his friends and co-workers. When it comes to sleeping with a guy, the quantity of dates is an arbitrary measure of the state of your relationship.
So they had a passionate night together and continued to text one another but something had shifted…You don’t often see a woman plotting ways to sleep with many men and wiggle out of any sort of commitment, or a man trying to figure out how to get a girl to just commit and want only him.Just as there is a stigma against women who sleep with a lot of men, there is a stigma against men who are super into commitment and invest way too soon.I’ve dated guys like that, the ones who were ready to marry me on the first date, and I wasn’t flattered…I was freaked out.The truth is, deciding when to sleep with a guy is important and will have an impact on your relationship. No girl has ever lost interest in a guy because he slept with her on the first date while guys lose interest in girls all the time for giving it up too soon.My friend told me that she was waiting for him to ask her out for that Saturday night because she had purchased tickets to a booze cruise and thought that would make a fun date.
He usually asked her out for Saturday night no later than Wednesday and when he still hadn’t asked her out by Thursday she started to panic.Many years ago, a guy friend said something that completely changed the way I viewed sex and relationships.He said: “Before a girl sleeps with a guy, she has all the power.You can blame it on biology and a man’s innate need to spread his seed, or on today’s culture which deems men who sleep with lots of women studs (and women who sleep with lots of men sluts), but it’s just the way it is.As such, women have control when it comes to sex and can decide whether to give in or not, while men have the control when it comes to commitment.But even still, I told her flat out that she slept with him too soon. MORE: Ask a Guy – Is Sex on the First Date A Relationship-Killer?